Humans in 30ish – Episode 5


LUKE: I am going to start with something Matt, that’s, well, I think what I’m saying is it is a trend or a fad or a phase that needs to end. And that is serving food in jars. I think the time has come, enough’s enough, it’s been fun. It sort of seems to me now it’s getting a bit far.

MATT: Well, what type of food and what type of jar?

L: Ok, well, look I don’t want to time stamp it because I don’t know how far back it goes, but it’s fairly recent and it started with things like juices and smoothies at restaurants or cafes or what not being served, and that was a bit of fun. It was something new and a bit of fun, I’m not sure where it originated. But what it’s morphed into Matt, and it confuses me in its non-practical way of eating or dining, it’s turned into things like, would you believe there’s now dishes served in jars like pasta and salads and all sorts of entrees on menus and what I’m saying here is enough’s enough. We’re almost trying too hard now to force things in jars, and I think it’s time to put the lid on those jars and pop them away.

M: Yeah, look, it’s been a while since I’ve forced anything into a jar, but I did want to clarify, you’re cool with domestic jars? Like if I got some Meredith Goats Cheese in a jar with the oils, that’s cool, but you’re talking about actual restaurants, or food and beverage places serving thing in jars. You wouldn’t keep that jar would you? Like it’s just served in a jar.

L: No, it’s served in a jar as it would be a mug or a cup or a bowl, or whatever it needs to be in. You’re right, it’s the venues, it’s the establishments that are continuingly trying to, develop. I get it that it was fun and exciting, but I just think surely there’s enough creativity in some of the owners of these establishments minds to move away from the jar and perhaps look at another sort of….

M: But what salad is getting served in a jar? I haven’t come across a salad jar.

L: I’ve seen a mix, basically think about just what would be maybe as a side salad or even a salad dish. But they’re just being put into a jar, and again, I don’t know why. There’s nothing practical about it. It’s nonsensical in a way, when some of these foods, when you actually think about the process of eating, because that’s what you’re there for, no one’s enjoying that, no one is.

M: Yeah, look, sometimes I’ve enjoyed an exotic juice in a jar or a cocktail, and that’s refreshing because of the glass, and it’s recycled and obviously that’s fine, but I would agree with you that food from a jar, it seems to be too cylindrical, that cylinder style thing for a salad, a salad I think once you place it, it needs to be able to just fall. Whereas I couldn’t imagine a salad could be itself in a jar.

L: It’s crammed in and I’ve seen it in person a couple of times, but I even jumped online just to make sure that I wasn’t seeing things and, yeah, it’s a thing. And you know, there’s nothing appealing about seeing a salad jammed into a jar. So it’s put me off and I’m even a bit over smoothies and that sort of thing now. Just move on. I think jars just needs to be put away and moved away from.

M: I think you might have touched on something a little bit deeper, though, because it seems to be anything recycled that can hold something is a bit of a cool trend, so you probably see in a year they might be getting lamps, old lamp shades and putting, you know like salad or something in, just different objects that could be recycled. Then that becomes a trend that you’d read in Broadsheet, “lamp shade serving”. Oh yeah, did you hear about lampshades serving? And it just takes off and you could really make up any fad in hospitality couldn’t you.

L: And I get it at the time and the jar was fun, but it’s time. I think it’s time. I just hope they don’t try and push it any further. If I see a burger or a parmigiana stuck into a jar at a pub, that’ll do me. I’ll be throwing that across the room. Yeah, so it’s no jars.

M: Well, in summary, I’m absolutely behind you. A jar is to hold something. It’s not to be served in a jar. So I’m with you with that good call. Yeah, jarring!


M: Actually I was talking about the domestic jar, and now I want to talk about a domestic issue off the bat. Houseplants. And Gnats. The gnats that come with house plants. Now have you had much experience with house plants and what I thought were drain flies but actually called gnats?

L: Not so much the gnats. Funnily enough we’re going through a bit of a house plant phase at the moment, so we’re trying to bring a bit of that in, but I haven’t, no, I’m a bit on edge now because I hadn’t thought of that and I hadn’t come across them so far.

M: How long have you had your house plants there?

L: A couple of months.

M; Okay. Okay. So it’s early days so they’re probably on their way. Okay? I’ve been battling gnats for the best part of three years and yeah, gnats could survive an apocalypse. They are extraordinary. And it started at work at my old work we had indoor plants and there was just gnats everywhere and we think they originated from the drain, but then they were in the plants. These things, like, I was having some Greek yoghurt one day, and one just flew out of my Greek yoghurt and then my partner who is a big house plant person, she brought in all these houseplants and all of a sudden these gnats just started taking over the house and see they resided in a house plant, but as soon as they see a human, it’s like, oh, what’s going on here? They just want to be part of it, you know? They’re just in your face. They’re not really doing anything, but they’re just in your face and like, they just want to hang out and they’re the most frustrating thing. They’re so difficult to kill, they’re like the T1000, from Terminator 2. You’ll kill it, but it’ll just morph into something else.

L: So they’re not strictly just in the plant, they will move around the home freely?

M: The plant brings them in, and that’s where I guess they breed. But as soon as they see a human, they just wanna hang. And they’re just like, in your face, like, what are we doing? What’s happening today? They don’t do anything. They’re not biting you or anything. There’s been times where I’ve been asleep and one’s just flown out of my nose. I’m trying to do some work, and they’re just there. And they’re impossible to kill and they just appear. And I think a lot of listeners will feel me because they’re so hard to kill and get rid of.

L: So is there a preferred method off extermination? Or that you’ve come across or not yet?

M: Look, I’m actually at a point where I’m in a good place with the gnats. We’ve tried apple cider vinegar. I’ve tried just hunting them one by one, like predator, you know? But they keep coming at you. I got very adept at killing them because you’ve got to just be that little step ahead. You know, if they fly right, you just gotta be just slightly ahead. And I got really good at it, but they kept coming. So, luckily enough, my partner’s mother, Mama Maria, shout out to Maria tonight, she had a remedy, which was; if you have house plants, line the soil with rocks because the soil is normally exposed. Then you, and this is okay to do because you’re not spraying the soil, you spray the rocks, the top of the rocks, with Mortein, right? And therefore, you have a coating of Mortein on the rock, the soil doesn’t get affected, so the plants healthy, gnats gone.

L: Wow! So you’ve built a rock formation of a moat, basically around your castle.

M: Impenetrable. And I haven’t seen one, maybe for a month and a half.

L: So this is a success story?

M: It’s a big success. We’ve won! I never thought it would be possible, but we’re here today and the gnats are out of my life, and it’s actually quite emotional.

L: Do you miss the times roaming through the house with a tiny little spear trying to get one by one gnats?

M: You know, there’d be numerous ways. I’m so glad they’re not, you know, flying out of my food, for example.

L: Fantastic.

M: Yeah, so that’s a win for me!

L: Well, that’s a win for you. I mean, that’s a win for our listeners. It’s a life hack. As you said, I’m sure there’s people listening that have gone, yeah, I can see one right now. So there you go. Thank you, Matt, on behalf of the people.

M: Yeah I wanted to be really positive this week.


L: I think that’s very positive. Well done. So if we’re moving on, this is something that I was pondering on the couch the other day while watching, funnily enough, the hat you’re wearing is kind of topical in what I’m going to bring up. But I’m a sport fan, you’re a sport fan. I was sitting there the other day watching, and I believe it was a playoff game with the Lakers playing, Matt and I started thinking about the name firstly, the Lakers and how that came about. And then I just started thinking about other team names and something that’s been a on my mind for a while is that there’s just some really terrible team names in my opinion, and I sort of got sucked into this, wormhole of finding out about team names and where they come from. And just finding some, what I’m saying are just horrible competitive sport, in some cases, very physical and rough sports, and you’ve got team names that just don’t do the job for me, and I’m really bothered by it in a lot of ways.

M: Like what sort of names?

L: Well as I said, the Lakers is one that doesn’t make a lot of sense for me.

M: It’s cool though.

L: Well, it’s cool now. It’s cool that they’ve made it cool. LA has made it cool. But things like in Rugby League, for example, it’s very physical, lots of hard hitting and you’ve got a team called the Eels!? Really? Eels?

M: Slippery.

L: Another one and a big one. A big one for me that I always think, it’s just a miss. They’ve just missed it badly. Is an NBA team, the New Orleans Pelicans. Pelicans? Come on.

M: Well, I do have a story of a pelican so don’t judge a pelican by its cover. Because there’s a story of a puppy pug that was running along a beach and it was off the lead, and a pelican scooped it up and flew out and threw it in the middle of the ocean. Gone. So don’t underestimate a pelican

L: Yeah but there’s no teams getting around called the puppy pugs. You know what I’m saying? So a pelicans not really a threat or a physical presence. I mean, there’s great team names out there, and I’m going to touch on a couple here that I know you’ll be super familiar with. There’s nothing wrong with the Demons or the Hawks. Matt, I know you’re a Hawks man.

M: I think that I don’t like the demon’s name. That’s kind of oh the demons!!

L: Well it’s better than the Saints, you know, like one’s bit good and the other one’s down and dirty and ready to cause hell. But interestingly enough, if we throw back to the 1940’s, your club, and if it wasn’t for the famous Roy Cazaly, would still be getting around called the Mayblooms.

M: What’s a maybloom?

L: That’s what Hawthorn, that’s what they were called back in the day, until Roy Cazaly…

M: No but what is it?

L: Well it’s a flower is it not? Some sort of flower reference. He took a stand and said this needs to be more aggressive team name and hence the Hawks were born, and very similar fashion, the demons were nicknamed the fuchias for a while, which again is a flower reference, before, and I’m pushing back to even I think the 30’s and people out there who might be die hard footy fans would probably be familiar with the name Frank “Checker” Hughes, and he made a stand and said, you guys need to lift your heads and play like demons and then bang, demons. You know what I’m saying? So some of these people, back in the day…

M: I do, but I’m more interested in your knowledge of the history of it I think that’s really cool that you’ve done that research.

L: Well it’s bothered me for sometime and I thought, there’s got to be something to this. But, you know, we’re talking about the best part of a century ago. there were people that were able to go, you know what these team names, they’re not up to it. So we need to, Hawks is better, Demons is better.

M: Even the Magpies is a bit questionable, isn’t it?

L: Yeah. I mean, you know, a magpie? Oh they swoop oh.

M: They’re quite bright and they do swoop.

L: They’re annoying.

M: The Crows, crows are quite majestic a times. But then, like the Browns in America, what are the Browns?

L: Or the blues? And another if we’re just throwing a few more questionable around, another American team, the Jazz. I mean, that doesn’t even make sense. And again, just to give you a bit more background behind that, they were originally formed in New Orleans. That makes a bit of sense. Then they moved to Utah, and they just said, ah we’ll keep the name, that doesn’t make sense anymore so you can’t even claim that it’s a reference to your home city. It’s just a fail.

M: It would be interesting to see if there was any data on those sort of misaligned names with lack of success, you know, the Jazz got close but never, never got there you know.

L: Absolutely, absolutely. And I will finish with this and this is where I feel there is some sense. When a lot of the NBA teams were named, it was like a poll, so the public got involved and suggested names. But there have been instances where the clubs themselves have gone, nah, we’re going to just do it. Milwaukee, my team that I follow in the NBA, the two of the most popular names were nominated by the public, were the skunks or the robins. Can you imagine the skunks were in the NBA today? No. Doesn’t work. That’s where the administration just went, nah nah, we’ll go with the Bucks.

M: Well, can I ask what is a Laker?

L: Well, good question. And I did look into it. I’m very researchy tonight. I’m absolutely on my toes. You can feel my energy. Again, so the Lakers were formed not in LA, so where they were, they were in a state of lakes, full of lakes. So it was very much very, very relevant name for that time. When they moved to LA, again and in fairness, they’d already had some success and built the brand, so it probably made sense to keep that name. But I think you know, there’s only a handful of lakes in LA or around their home stadium, so it doesn’t make a lot of sense in that regard, but I’ll let the Lakers pass because, by the time they moved to LA the brand was established. That’s okay. I’m okay with that.

M: It’s better than, some of the football teams where it’s an acronym. And like a town, it’s like some sort of mailing address. FNC whatta whatta I think, yeah, I prefer the, underwhelming animal or mammal than the bloody postcode and the acronym that you get in football overseas. Good one, good one. I like that.

L: And I want to end by saying anyone listening that’s involved in sport that might be starting a new club anytime soon, just think about it. Just think about it, that’s all. That’s all I’m asking.


M: There’s something I want to end on the last topic, and it’s sort of been a bit of an elephant in the room. Or should I say, the wet elephant in the room? And I’m talking about a little song that’s dropped recently called “WAP”, or in other words, “Wet Ass Pussy”.

L: Yeah, wow.

M: You’ve heard it, haven’t you?

L: Yeah, and I don’t want to cut in, but this is only….

M: You can’t not cut in

L: The full, unedited version has only been brought to my attention very recently. And wow. I mean, wow!

M: It’s visceral, isn’t it? Yeah, look, I’d love to hear your thoughts because, in my opinion, I’m a big fan for many reasons. I think a) it’s a great song. It’s got a great beat. It’s got really good raps and it gets the people going. But it is. It’s provocative isn’t it? And what I love about it is it’s just passionate. It’s passion! I think it’s come in the pandemic, and I think it’s almost counterintuitive to the pandemic. But I think, wow, there’s going to a lot of WAP babies out there. Don’t you think?

L: Potentially, potentially. Look….

M: Please go, I’d love to hear your thoughts

L: I don’t really know what, because I get there’s the trend around the TIK-TOK dance move around it, is that right? You’re more involved in that sort of thing that I am

M: No I’m not involved in TIK-TOK you can’t say that I mean, my daughter’s used a little bit, but we banned it since that other incident a while a go. But no I’m talking about the actual song.

L: Okay, the thing that jumped out to me when I was shown the full unedited version, including the clip the video is, yeah, it’s just a real smack in the face of just wow, ok, this is happening now. This is music now. Okay, look, you’re right, the tune and the beat and all that I’m sure it obviously works because there’s a big following for it. But do you think that one of the biggest sellers for this is that sort of, there’s nothing left out, like it’s just all in.

M: I think it’s just, it’s the filthiest, most tasteful song and clip. It hits hard on that rawness, and I was talking about that passion, but it’s done so well, but it’s also so honest, and I don’t want to make it, you know, there was a lot of rap songs in the eighties and nineties, very male dominated and, talking about being with hundreds of bitches and getting all this sort of stuff done and what not. So it’s great to see just that that really, not only a great song, but just that passion and that reclaiming, a woman reclaiming their own desires. But also it’s quite instructional. So for all the lovers out there that, it’s a bit of that Richard Mercer love songs and dedications for all the lovers out there. Let’s get a bit of WAP, let’s put it on, a bit of wet ass pussy and it’s the wet ass and the wet pussy, sort of two layers. And I think it’s wonderful and the aggressiveness and I’m right behind it.

L: Yeah ok, it’s…yeah ok! Look it’s new, they’ve hit a market. They’ve hit a market and it’s a global market. Is there an edited version that is on the radio waves, airwaves? Or is that not quite that it’s just more of a social media sensation?

M: The thing is, and pardon the pun, but the edited version doesn’t water down Wet Ass Pussy at all because it’s just Wet and Cushy and I mean, you know, it still has, like, macaroni in a pot and all those lyrics it’s just so visceral. That’s why it’s brilliant because you can’t even water it down when you try to water it down. It’s just full of flavour.

L: So commercially it’s established and it’s successful. So I mean, we could sit here and judge it as much as we like Matt, but I think that

M: I’m not judging it. I’m loving it!

L: Well, I think it speaks for itself. I think the answer is in the success it’s had and, maybe this will open up a new freedom of honesty for everyone writing music from now on. I don’t know.

M: Yeah, I know what you mean. And it’s actually hard to articulate what it is, it’s so truthful in a way. I think for all the lovers out there, that when you’re in something and it’s that passion, I think they really capture that. And it’s what the woman feels and what the guy could do. And it’s just fun. But it comes with that boom! You know, that real attitude. For all the shit that’s come from 2020, I think this is a win……

Follow the links for the full audio episode





Published by lukemccredden

Voiceover artist and podcast producer/creator.

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